While it’s not quite as widely acclaimed or popular as some of Quentin Tarantino’s other movies, The Hateful Eight offers a bleak, uncompromising, breathtaking vision of the Old West. The movie must’ve been a treat to cast, since it revolves around an ensemble of bloodthirsty, rough-around-the-edges western villains who are confined to a haberdashery by a snowstorm.
In Tarantino’s movie, released in 2015, these roles were played by revered actors like Samuel L. Jackson and Jennifer Jason Leigh. If the film was made in the 1980s, it might have starred such actors as Harrison Ford and Danny Glover.
8 Charles Bronson As John “The Hangman” Ruth
Originally played by Kurt Russell, John “The Hangman” Ruth is a cold-blooded bounty hunter who brings in his bounties alive based on his conviction that the hangman deserves to make a living as much as anybody else.
This brooding antihero role would’ve been perfect for Charles Bronson in the ‘80s when he was collaborating with J. Lee Thompson on darker, grittier movies like 10 to Midnight and Kinjite: Forbidden Subjects.
7 Sissy Spacek As Daisy Domergue
Jennifer Jason Leigh earned the movie’s only acting nomination at the Oscars for her shocking portrayal of mass murderer Daisy Domergue. Based on her rap sheet, Daisy might be the most hateful of the titular octet.
In the ‘80s, this part could’ve been played brilliantly by Sissy Spacek. She nailed the rough, pulpy tone of Terrence Malick’s lovers-on-the-run crime thriller Badlands opposite Martin Sheen and convincingly conveyed a murderous glint in her eye in the prom night massacre scene at the end of Brian De Palma’s Carrie.
6 Wilford Brimley As General Sanford Smithers
Bruce Dern’s General Sanford Smithers spends the majority of his screen time in The Hateful Eight sitting in an armchair, looking grumpy. Dern doesn’t hold back in portraying the despicable ex-Confederate’s eponymous hatefulness.
Based on his unforgettably sinister performances in The China Syndrome and Absence of Malice, the iconic Wilford Brimley could’ve done a great job with this role in the ‘80s.
5 Harrison Ford As Chris Mannix
Walton Goggins played Chris Mannix, who claims to be the new Sheriff of Red Rock, as arguably the funniest character in The Hateful Eight. Goggins is a great reactionary actor and Mannix is a great reactionary role: reacting to the Lincoln letter, reacting to the poisoned coffee, reacting to the twist reveal, etc.
This role could’ve been played spectacularly by Harrison Ford, one of the gruffest and most charismatic movie stars of the ‘80s, who made laugh-out-loud moments out of similar reactionary beats in the Indiana Jones movies.
4 Michael Caine As “English” Pete Hicox
After he played major roles in Tarantino’s first two movies, The Hateful Eight marked Tim Roth’s first collaboration with the writer-director in over two decades. “English” Pete Hicox initially presents himself as a well-spoken British character actor, but the flashback reveals that his real accent is an aggressive Cockney one similar to Roth’s iconic “Pumpkin” character from Pulp Fiction.
Perhaps the most famous Cockney accent in Hollywood belongs to Michael Caine. Caine was a huge star by the time the ‘80s rolled around, thanks to crime movies like The Italian Job and Get Carter, and he could’ve played a similar moral ambiguity in The Hateful Eight.
3 Victor Argo As Señor Bob
While The Hateful Eight is an ensemble piece, the script gives some characters more attention than others. Major Warren, for example, is a much bigger role than Grouch Douglass. Señor Bob is one of the most underutilized characters in the movie, but Demián Bichir does a lot with little screen time as he nails every deadpan comedic delivery.
Throughout the ‘70s, Victor Argo made a name for himself playing tough-as-nails bad guys. He’s best known for his supporting roles in Scorsese movies like Mean Streets and Taxi Driver. He would’ve fit right into the rough, violent world of The Hateful Eight.
2 Robert De Niro As Grouch Douglass
Michael Madsen hadn’t worked with Tarantino since he played one of the names on the Bride’s revenge list in Kill Bill when he was cast as Grouch Douglass in The Hateful Eight. Yet another brooding antihero, Douglass pretends to be writing his memoirs and visiting his mother for Christmas, but turns out to be maybe the most ruthless and bloodthirsty of them all.
Three decades earlier, Robert De Niro could’ve been a great choice for this part. He was a bigger star than ever in the ‘80s, thanks to his revelatory turn in Raging Bull, and he always did wonders with characters who exist on the meaner end of the moral spectrum.
1 Danny Glover As Major Marquis Warren
Samuel L. Jackson is the ultimate Tarantino actor, and The Hateful Eight’s Major Marquis Warren was his biggest Tarantino role to date. Warren is a grizzled, aging bounty hunter who turns out to be the Poirot of the story, figuring out the mystery bit by bit and keeping all the clues to himself, so any actor who takes on this role needs to be able to handle monologues (which, of course, wasn’t an issue with Jackson, the king of explosive monologues).
Danny Glover played a veteran lawman on the brink of retirement in the wildly popular Lethal Weapon franchise. Major Warren is essentially Roger Murtaugh if he existed 100 years earlier.
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